I know I’m suffering over my mother’s diagnosis, and I know that that is normal… What I can’t seem to grasp is how I’m grieving.
My mom has only been diagnosed with cancer for a little while now and everything is in pieces. My mom is suffering a lot — guilt, depression, fear, anxiety and panic attacks, plus her pain, maybe it’s suddenly seeing her this way that’s got my caught off guard? I don’t know how to feel or handle any of this.
At first, I cried a lot. I don’t know if it’s still a form of shock but it’s like I can’t really cry about it now. I feel empty. Numb. this can’t be happening to me. I have accepted it, I get it but it’s like I can’t wrap my head around it yet.