I came home from school to find my parents crying. I felt panicked, and my mind went to the worst — My mother’s cancer had come back. Funny looking back now, how that was my worst thought. That was the worst possible thing that could happen. I was wrong, oh so wrong. It was just one of the many awful possibilities of life.
My sister followed in behind me and I could feel her freeze up. We both simply stood in the doorway staring. I swear I had the urge to just run, because when they looked up at us, I knew, just knew this wouldn’t be good. I knew there was more cancer.
What I didn’t know was that it was my dad’s cancer this time, not my moms. When my parents told us my vision went black for a second. I thought I had prepared myself for everything. I thought I knew how cruel a place the world could be.
In the first few hours, I felt weak. I felt like I had no fight left. we had just finished this battle with my mom and we were finally getting back on our feet. How were we supposed to go through these ups and downs all over again with my dad while still worrying about my mom?
My emotions change a lot lately, as they did when my mom was sick. In some ways, I feel better equipped this time but its so unfair that I do. I have to believe that there is a reason this is happening to us, believe that we must be strong enough to handle this. If there’s one thing I have learned, its to appreciate what I’ve been given. I am grateful, and at times I am bitter. I always return to that though, to being thankful for the time Ive been given with my family.
Reading this just ripped me to pieces. I can’t imagine having to go through it once, let alone twice with another parent. Sending all of my love and strength to you! Your mom beat it and now your dad will too!